Where are the pictures?

Where are the pictures?

I saw the list below posted on a photography forum by member "BigRed450" recently. The post date was actually in June of 2005, but the comments resonated with my current situation.

Progression of a Photographer

1. You start out with very little knowledge
2. You start doing research and realize it is much more difficult than you imagined.
3. You begin to pick up knowledge, the technical side of things.
4. You begin to use the technical knowledge and it works.
5. You start to feel as if you are mastering the technical
6. You begin to feel you know a LOT.
7. You start posting images that you are proud of.
8. You KNOW your images are better than much of what you see.
9. Family and friends start to oooo and aaaahhh at your images
10. Pro's don't seem to acknowledge you.
11. You think it's jealousy.
12. You reach a valley in your photography. You are starting to notice that your images aren't quite what you thought they would be.
13. You start to notice that, in your images, the models hands, the composition, the depth...isn't quite what you wanted.
14. Even your very favorite photograph isn't as good as you once thought. "I should have . . . "
15. You are now completely dissatisfied with everything you have ever shot.
16. You begin to realize that your photography is NOTHING compared to the masters.
17. You begin to see the differences in your photography compared to what you see published.
18. Now you are beginning to learn.

So I am at a crossroads. I am somewhere between burned out and curious as to what is next. This is truly a learning process more painful than anything I would have previously imagined.

Somewhere after item #18 is something I came up with called "The Rule of 1000." Basically, I have purchased every piece of starter equipment that I can afford for under $1000 and I have done a decent job at what I've done with that equipment. Those purchases have gotten me to where I am now. But, where do I go from here? "The Rule of 1000" now says that any piece of equipment I buy from this point forward will cost me a minimum of $1,000 dollars. Example - An Entry Level Pro Lighting Kit: $1,600; A new camera body: $4,999; A Pro Printer: $1,200; A competent computer with storage for processing hundreds of digital images: $2,400; Lens (any kind - wide angle, portrait, telephoto): $1,200 - $8,000+; A professionally designed website outsourced to a designer: $2,600+

The rub here is that I have found a level of competance that can no longer "make do" with prosumer equipment. I have also found myself at a crossroads of actual cost versus creative fees. I'm stuck. Without a formal education in photography or the accessibility of a "master" willing to take on an "apprentice" I will soon have to make a distinction between hobby and profession.

I have been very fortunate to have experienced so much in such a little amount of time. Memories are many and experiences unique from anything else. #18 is prevalent - I'm beginning to learn.

Pictures will eventually find their way back on this website. Some day.